Coaching Unconditional Emotions
Our emotions are the number one motivator that moves us forward or keeps us behind. If you are angry all the time whether with yourself or with the people around you, you can't be happy, and you can't be emotionally well. When we condition every aspect of our lives, we keep ourselves away from joy and happiness. When we think that this person needs to be that way, and that institution needs to pay better attention to its workers, and that rule must be changed for us to achieve our goal, we are limiting ourselves. Remember that ninety-nine percent of our failures come from our habit of making excuses. If you feel that a certain person you communicate with daily doesn’t align with your values or needs, then why even bother to be around him or her? Unless this communication falls into your professional field, walk away from that person. If you disagree with your pay rate, ask for a raise, find something that will suit your needs better, or get an additional job if you have no choice but to stay with your old employment for some reason.
Stop Whining and Start Doing!
Remember: When we complain, we make excuses for ourselves, therefore, anchoring our failure.
Can you imagine if Steve Jobs cried over his hurt feelings when his companions, who promised to always be on his side, turned their backs on him? Did he wait for them to change so he could come back? —No. He knew that they were not to be trusted again. What would have happened if he thought poorly of himself? Something like: I must be not that good if they don't need me now. I failed my career... That's fine... I'm good at digging carrots in my garden though. Instead of diving into such miserable thinking, he knew he was good. He knew he was a professional. He knew that he was talented, passionate, genuine, and hardworking, and he knew that with all his skills and personal qualities, he was set for success. He had an unconditional emotion that moved him forward—the passion for his job. And he had an unconditional desire—to do his best and to be at the top of his company.
Get into the habit of not thinking in terms of conditions "I'll be happy if..." Instead, think "I'm happy because..." Thinking "I'll be happy if..." locks your chance to be happy and opens the room for envy. And when you have envy, you compare your life to that of other people, and then, you feel miserable and attract only pity and compassion rather than respect. Happiness is a feeling of satisfaction. If you are satisfied with your financial situation, you are happy financially. If you have nothing you wish to change in your partner, then you are happy with your relationship. However, you may not yet have financial stability or a loving relationship. In that case, you can empower yourself by imagining the final result of your journey—as if you are already achieved your goals. By doing so you elicit the feelings you want and experience positive emotions. Without waiting for the condition to change, you can focus on your emotion and practice being successful, well-off, loved, or whatever desire you have. By feeling it before it comes, you are experiencing the emotion unconditionally. Remember, when we enjoy the journey to our dreams, we put ourselves in a happier, healthier state of mind that empowers us and improves our chances of accomplishing our goals.
Tip: Practice feeling emotion before events happen!
With unconditional emotion and unwavering belief in yourself, you can always experience a state of happiness!